last night at the cheap theater four of us ended up in the front row watching johnny depp channel keith richards and peppy le pew in that pirate movie. after paying only $3 to get in and $3 for a large popcorn, we settled in and munched down. the popcorn was salty and saturated with that fake butter stuff that's nuclear yellow colored yet oh-so-delicious, but it was also sort of stale tasting, even though we had just watched the girl make it not 10 minutes before.

"i wonder if, along with the second run movies, they also buy the leftover popcorn from the other theaters." kristi said.

"i was just wondering that same thing." i replied

about halfway through the movie, my keen snout picked up a foreign scent. it was sweet, fruity, like adolescent perfume. it smelled good. i was about to let everyone know that i was going to go to the lobby in search of the source of the smell at the candy counter, but i decided to see if the edible part of my sensory experience was all in my head. i turned to kristi.

"i smell candy," i said, sniffing the air slightly. the odor had intensified when i leaned over her. "do you?"

she gave me a look and squinted. then she thrust her hand into her bag and pulled out a ziplock bag full of runts. how had i smelled the sugary goodness through the bag? who knows? i'm a big pig, i think that's apparent.